短小的英語小笑話加翻譯

　　冷笑話不同於一般的笑話，以其獨特的制笑機制，能瞬間製造出一種特殊氛圍。小編精心收集了，供大家欣賞學習!

　　：Liar,Liar

　　騙子，騙子

　　A wife went to the police station with her next-door neighbor to report that her husband wasmissing.

　　老婆與隔壁鄰居到警察局報案 說她的老公失蹤了。

　　The policeman asked her for a description.

　　警察要求，她形容一下。

　　She said,"He is 35 years old,6 feet 4 inches,has dark eyes,dark wavy hair,an athleticbuild,weighs 185 pounds,is soft-spoken ,and is good to the children."

　　她說：“他三十五歲，六尺四寸，黑眼睛，波浪狀的深色頭髮;體格健壯，體重185磅，說話很輕，而且對小孩子很好。”

　　The next-door neighbor protested,

　　隔壁鄰居期提出反駁說：

　　"Your husband is 5 feet 4 inches,chubby,bald,has a big mouth,and is mean to your children."

　　“你老公五尺四寸，胖嘟嘟 的，禿頭，有一個太嘴巴，而且對你的小孩很刻薄。”

　　The wife replied,"Yes,but who wants"THIS KIND OF STUFF"back?"

　　老婆回答說：“你說對了，可是誰會要 這種沒用的廢物 回來呀?”

　　：Bad Day at Work

　　糟糕的上班日

　　A man joined a big multinational company as a trainee.

　　有一名男子加入一家大型跨國。公司接受訓練。

　　On his first day at work,he dialed the pantry and shouted into the phone,

　　在他上班的第一天，他撥電話到餐飲室，並且，對著電話大聲喊!

　　"Get me a coffee quickly!"

　　“ 快點給我送杯咖啡過來!”

　　The voice from the other side responded,

　　電話另外-端的聲音卻響應說:

　　"You fool you have dialed the wrong extension!Do you know who you are talking to,dumbo?"

　　“你這個笨蛋，你撥錯分機了!蠢蛋，你知道你在跟誰說話嗎?”這名受訓的人回答說，

　　"No,"replied the trainee.

　　“不知道。”

　　The man shouted back immediately,

　　這名男子立刻大聲吼回去：

　　"And do you know who you are talking to,you fool?"

　　“你這個笨蛋，你知道你在跟誰說話嗎?…總經理回答：

　　"No,replied the General Manager.

　　“不知道。”這名受訓 的人周答說：

　　"Good !",replied the trainee and then put down the phone!

　　“很好!”，然後就把電話給掛了。

　　：Answer the Iron

　　接聽熨斗

　　A guy walks into his office ,and both of his ears are all bandaged up.

　　有一個人走進他的辦公室，他的兩個耳朵都包紮了繃帶。

　　The boss says,"What happened to your ears?"

　　老闆說：“你的耳朵怎麼啦?”

　　He says,"Yesterday I was ironing a shirt when the phone rang!I accidentally answered the iron.

　　他說：“昨天電話響的時候，我正在用熨斗燙襯衫。我竟然無意閭就把熨斗拿來接聽。

　　The boss says,"Well,that expains one ear,but what happened to your other ear?"

　　老闆說：“ 嗯，好吧，那解釋了一個耳朵，可是你的另一個耳朵又是怎麼一回事呀?”

　　He says,"Well,jeez,I had to call the doctor!"

　　他說：“嗯，哎呀!我得打電給醫生嘛!”